This has been a rough week — one of the hardest weeks of my life. It’s a somewhat long, very personal story. If you know me and care about me, and you want more details, I would be willing to fill you in by email, phone, or whatever. But through everything, I have learned a lot, about myself, about my incredible God, and my incredible family, especially my wife. I have tasted anew God’s grace and forgiveness, seen my self-righteousness exposed and have seen again our need to trust the Word and not our feelings. There has been, this week, often a chasm between what I feel about things and what the truth of things are. In those moments I have prayed for grace and clung to the truth of God’s word.
Today, things are remarkably better, subjectively — that is, I feel better, having gone through a very deep emotional and spiritual valley.
It reminds me, again, that our theology must never be abstract. Honestly, in the depths of despair and being crushed in spirit theology means nothing if it does not have a practical effect on one’s life. It also demonstrates the importance of theology, because in some ways my theology helped me through. Knowing that God is good and that God is sovereign, both completely and simultaneously, provides a rock to stand on when enduring the gusts of horrible wind this life can blow.
It also shows the importance of fellowship and community built in trust. Without caring people this week, it would have been almost unbearable at times I think .
I have a couple of poems in progress right now, but nothing fined tuned.
I probably won’t post anything else today, and I am going to take my weekly internet sabbath tomorrow.
May all who are reading this be blessed and kept by our great and good God.