Seminarian Porn

“For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God.”

It’s interesting that here in 1 Thessalonians Paul defines sanctification in sexual terms, that is, in how one possesses one’s vessel. He gives two ways to possess it, positively, in sanctification and honor, and, negatively, not in lustful passion. I think that this legitimately relates to things other than actual intercourse — other sexual acts arising from lustful passion. So obviously, (and it’s not like we don’t know this), it’s a big deal.

That said, I know tons of Christian guys who struggle with porn.

Including seminary students. Some have overcome it, but many, however, have not. Maybe even the majority. I’ve known too many guys, and the testimonies are too consistent — a pornography struggle. My guess is a large percentage of male Southern students have a consistent sin issue related to pornography. I mentioned this high number estimate to a friend recently, and his response was, solemnly, “probably more.”It keeps coming up in conversations, and I’m beginning to think this is a big issue with seminarian guys.

Now, please don’t think I’m coming down hard and hypocritically — because I’ve struggled, and it’s not easy to say so. Pornography, by God’s grace, never was an every-day “addiction”, but there were seasons when it was not uncommon. But, by God’s grace, I have had victory for some time now. I don’t, honestly, know exactly how it was conquered in my life. Maybe it never got a strong foothold. But I am so glad that God has saved me from it. (And I pray he will continue to. I tell Laura to pray for me too, that I might keep my way pure).

Dustin, our pastor, mentioned this issue Sunday in his message, about people in Bible college and seminary being afraid to confess this sin. “Get help,” he implored them.

That, basically, is my motivation for writing this. Because it affects too many guys, and many of these guys, I’m sure, feel like they can’t tell anybody.

But, like I said, I’ve heard too many stories of too many people — people losing ministries and/or almost losing spouses. It’s hijacked so many. In today’s world, it might kill more ministries and marriages than any other single sin, directly or indirectly. That’s just a guess, but an informed guess.

I’ve found personally that I can easily wave an understanding and sympathetic (and apathetic!) hand at this when guys tell me about it. If my experience can be an accurate gauge, then I think quite a few guys have or will confide in others guys about this issue — but it doesn’t seem to help.

I think pretty much every story (and there are quite a few) is the same: The guys who have killed this issue seem to be guys who have been seriously raked over the coals for it. Guys need someone (often the significant female in their life ) to tell them how big a deal it is, how much it hurts them.

Man, knowing how much lust hurts Laura has given me a completely new perspective on how serious this is. I have glimpsed more clearly how God sees it.

So, I would plead with every guy out there — “Deal with it now!” Find someone who won’t let you get away with this. Find someone (like your wife) who doesn’t “understand” it. Find someone who will call you out and kick you toward holiness. Get help, and get it now.

Deal with it. Kill it, by the Spirit, so that you might live (Rom 8:13, as expounded by Owen). And do it now:

If you’re not married, before you drag into your marriage.

If you’re not in ministry, before you drag it into your pulpit.

If you are married, before it leads to something worse…

If you are in ministry, before someone else exposes it, and God’s name is defamed.

The gospel teems with hope for this. Believe me. I’ve know a lot of guys who have killed this sin in the power of the Spirit (myself included), washed in Jesus’ blood and have come out clean.